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As someone who clearly identifies as an “Order Muppet” myself, I see no lie in Paul’s observation. If you’re unfamiliar with Dahlia Lithwick’s philosophy of Chaos Muppets vs Order Muppets, I highly recommend her 2012 Slate piece in which she argues: “Every one of us is either a Chaos Muppet or an Order Muppet. Chaos Muppets are out-of-control, emotional, volatile…They make their way through life in a swirling maelstrom of food crumbs, small flaming objects, and the letter C. Cookie Monster, Ernie, Grover, Gonzo, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew and -- paradigmatically -- Animal, are all Chaos Muppets. Order Muppets -- and I’m thinking about Bert, Scooter, Sam the Eagle, Kermit the Frog, and the blue guy who is perennially harassed by Grover at restaurants…tend to be neurotic, highly regimented, [and] averse to surprises...They sometimes resent the responsibility of the world weighing on their felt shoulders, but they secretly revel in the knowledge that they keep the show running.” It’s almost unsettling how much I identify with Dahlia’s description of an Order Muppet. I’m guessing that Paul F. Tompkins would see some of himself in that portrayal, too. Which is why I consider his opinion on Ernie to be more than reasonable. The internet, as it often does, disagreed though, leading to one of the more enjoyable fracases I’ve seen in a while. One of the most sticky arguments (from folks who I assume identify as Chaos Muppets) is that Ernie invites Bernie’s “chaotic bullshit” into his life by choosing to live with him. Others argue that this blame-the-victim mentality also assumes a level of financial mobility on the part of Bert. Heck, we don’t know if he can just pick-up and move into his own apartment. He might be deeply in debt from buying all those books about pigeons. Anyway, I don’t want to quote the whole thing here, but I do suggest checking out the full thread if you want to forget about the real world for a bit. While we’re on the topic of Bluesky and Things On The Internet That Spark Joy, I also just stumbled on this 30-year-old local TV story from Baltimore about rave culture. Here are some of my favorite quotes from the piece: “To teenagers, raves might be considered the best thing since MTV.” “Just as rap music and baggy clothes and espresso have come to symbolize 90s fad culture, raves are making their mark.” “Anyone is accepted at a rave, except a person with an ego.” “It’s all electronic, and there’s no singing.”
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