People often ask me, “Andrew, what’s the key to making a really successful podcast?” 

And I say, “As a host, I try to talk about as many visual things as possible.” 

And then they say, “But your podcast is audio-only. Doesn’t that just frustrate the listeners and drive them away?” 

And I usually say, “Hey, have you tried that new fried pickle place in Ballard? I hear they have fried pickles,” or something like that to change the subject. 

Hi everyone! It’s me, Andrew, from TBTL. And I feel like I spent a lot of time on the show this week trying and failing to describe things that you, the listeners, could not see. And I’m hoping to use today’s newsletter to clear a few things up. 

First of all, my desk chair. I bought a new one for myself (well, a used one, really) from the University of Washington Surplus Store on Tuesday. My old chair looked pretty cool, but it wasn’t very comfortable for the long run. Here’s how I described it on the podcast:  

“It’s a plastic office chair with five wheels on it…I feel like if Madonna weren’t a musician, but an accountant, this is the chair she would use.” 

I’ve been thinking about that description ever since I uttered it because I find it to be three things:

1) Ridiculous
2) Unhelpful
3) Pretty inaccurate

Yet it still somehow captures the spirit of what I was trying to convey. So, I will let you be the judge. Here is a photo of the chair, followed by a poll question::

I will share the results in next week’s newsletter. If I remember. 

Speaking of office furniture, I also mentioned an Instagram account that I started following recently that celebrates cutting-edge business decor of the 1990s. It’s called @__________office (that’s not a typo, it’s just one of those beguiling Insta handles created to keep old people like me from talking about it.) I don’t usually turn to the ‘90s when I’m looking for interior design inspiration, but this feed has got me shaking my head saying, “Dammmmmn, Dilbert!” 

AND FINALLY, while we’re talking about Instagram feeds, I mentioned another one that popped onto my radar recently. It’s from a Maui-based designer named Taylor Penton, and his Insta account is called @taylorpenton. (Now that’s a handle I can wrap my head around!) He features a lot of his work on the site, including some amazing handmade fonts that I’ve come so close to purchasing, but then I remember that I’m not a graphic designer and I don’t have any use for a new font. And then I am sad about my life choices. 

So there you have it -- not just the key to a successful podcast, but also the key to a successful podcast newsletter: Describe things so inarticulately on the air that your listeners must sign-up for your newsletter to find out what the heck you were talking about. It’s called synergy, friends.

Luke and I have big plans for next week’s shows, by the way. We’re finally going to start playing all the voicemails you sent us featuring the songs you sing to your pets. The songs are soooo gooood you guys! I can’t wait to share all of them with you. 

Until then, have a great weekend! We’ll chat on Monday. 

Andrew

Hey Dummies

Music For Your Weekend

Luke’s Pick:  Harness Your Hopes by Pavement

I’m writing this from Nashville, which feels like the kind of place Stephen Malkmus would detest. I’m 90% sure he whispers “Trashville” at the end of one of his songs as the guitar feedback stretches into its 45th second. Have I actually heard him do this? No, because I rarely make it to the end of a Pavement song, which is a pretty wild thing to say about one of my favorite bands of all time. Look, Steve (he would hate that) and I have an understanding, he gets to do whatever he wants in his songs, and I get to like the good (my opinion) parts SO MUCH, that I don’t even care how terrible (my opinion) the other parts are. It’s worked for us for a quarter century, outlasted two marriages, and I’m not going to mess with it. 

Harness Your Hopes is a great example of this very dynamic. What in the Good Lord is going on for the first :23 seconds? I mean Steve, really? But at second :24 this song becomes so unbelievably good, that it wipes away all memory of the regrettable ouvrir. Life is never going to be perfect, but if we can be okay with the imperfections we’ll be a lot happier. Or if that doesn’t work just skip to the next song. Enjoy!

Andrew’s Pick:  Conduit For Sale by Pavement

I’m sharing this as a counter-protest to Luke’s besmirching of some of Pavement’s most interesting sounds. If you like the scratchy, weird, experimental side of Pavement, their 1993 collection of early releases called “Westing (By Musket and Sextant)” is for you and me alike. I spent my angsty college years yelling “I’M TRYING! I’M TRYING! I’M TRYING! I’M TRYING!” along with this song as I navigated my 1986 Dodge Caravan through the snowy streets of Kent, Ohio, and the fraught process of becoming an adult.

Listener Kristen:  After Midnight by Chappell Roan

I recently found Chappell Roan after she was the guest on Wait, Wait Don’t Tell Me. Peter Sagal sold it when he said he was a fan. She is delightful. This is from “The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess” --  all the songs are good. I chose After Midnight because it's got strong summer vibes, and no cursing or references to Adult Times like other songs on the album.

Ten Of The Week

What’s your name and where do you live? 
Judy Bornstein. San Mateo, CA.

When did you start listening to TBTL? How did you find the show?
I started listening about a zillion years (and a kajillion episodes ago).  It was post-radio, but definitely in the early podcast days (in the era of Sean de Tore and Jen Flash Andrews).  The podcast got some publicity every time Luke was on "Wait Wait Don't Tell Me," and I transferred my devotion from that show to this one.

How would your friends describe you?
Hardworking, funny, and overly proud of my 2 cats (Jack and Zelda - the cutest!)

What was your favorite cereal when you were a kid?Is it still your fav? 
Either Cap'n Crunch with Crunch berries (even though it always cuts up the roof of my mouth), or Cocoa Pebbles.  Alas, I no longer eat sugar cereals, so these are just a (sweet) distant memory.

What food do you love to eat the most of?
Salad!  I make a big fresh salad every day - super yummy!  Of course if I could eat a lot of something and suffer no consequences, I would probably go for french fries.

What’s the best or worst nickname you ever had?
My closest friends call me JB (my initials), which makes me feel like a 1930s corporate boss-type person, probably twirling a cigar and making backroom deals.  Kinda cool.

If you could play one song on TBTL, what would it be?
You Go Down Smooth by Lake Street Dive

What’s a special skill that you have?
I'm pretty fearless about helping people resolve conflicts

What’s a skill you *wish* you had?
I wish I were a great singer - maybe in my next incarnation?

If you were driving down the street and you saw Luke and Andrew on the sidewalk, what would you yell at them as you drove past?
"Hi Dummies!  What you do is so important!" (but then I would immediately feel terrible about calling my imaginary friend-o's dummies and I would take it right back!).  Actually I'd probably just pull over and hop out so I could realize a dream of saying hello in person!

Can other Tens find you on social media?
I'm just on LinkedIn, so I can be found here.

Just a reminder that you can find our Ten of the Week form here! If you’ve never been a TOTW before (or if it’s been a really, really long time) fill out our little questionnaire. And check out our Ten of the Week archive here!

This Week On TBTL

#4269 Large Haberman Collider 
Monday, August 12
Luke is staying in a hotel  in L.A.that might be too L.A. And Andrew offers “the Papa Murphy's of hot takes” regarding the Australian breakdancer who is getting roasted after her Olympic performance. 

#4270 Cool It, Aesop! 
Tuesday, August 12
Luke learned a very valuable lesson about telling the truth this morning, and it may change him forever. Or not. He and Andrew also offer an appreciation of LA billboards. 

#4271 Show Me The Monkey
Wednesday, August 13
Luke is impressed with the kindness of Ryan Seacrest. Andrew is impressed with the wonders of the University of Washington Surplus Store. And they’re both tickled by the audio of a Mariners outfielder talking about his monkeys. 

#4272 The Spruik Luke
Thursday, August 14
Luke is excited about a new Australian word he learned today, and Andrew is excited about some tavern-related developments in his neighborhood. 

#4273 Nashville Cryline
Friday, August 16
Luke went into a part of Nashville last night that he really shouldn’t have. He and Andrew also discuss an astounding claim by Disney in a new lawsuit. And Middleshelf Maggie helps Luke find the long-lost ringtone he’s been searching for.