I was shocked by something I read today. ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏

Sometimes, when you are facing a challenge and you need some inspiration, it’s a good idea to turn to your friends for support. Sometimes, though, it’s a very bad idea to do that. 

Hello, everyone, and welcome to the latest installment of the TBTL newsletter! I hope this email finds you well.

Animated gif of Diane Keaton typing and crying (From the movie "As good as it gets") with the text HOW YOUR EMAIL FINDS ME

I’ll be honest with you, I was struggling a bit this afternoon. I knew I owed you all a fresh, Friday newsletter -- as is our practice around these parts -- but I didn’t know exactly what to write about. I considered telling you about the new shirt that I ordered online, but I didn’t have much to say about it, other than it’s blue and it gets here on Monday. I considered writing about the Seattle Mariners, who are playing their very first spring training game as I type this, but I figure you’ll get more than enough Leo Rivas talk from me and Luke in the coming weeks. I even considered writing about the final episode of M*A*S*H, but I’m still not quite emotionally prepared to address that.

Sometimes, when I find myself in this situation, I open up my inbox and re-read other people’s newsletters for inspiration. I do this a lot with Adien Arada’s under the influence Substack, as well as our pal Lindy’s missives from the Text Me Back world. 

On this desperate Friday, however, I remembered that our dear friend and former colleague, Stu “The StuBot” Neuman, recently launched his own daily missive called Midwest Excellence. It’s so new, you can still smell the mimeograph ink and it’s slightly warm to the touch. More importantly though -- and no surprise here -- it’s just a damned wonderful read. Stu is the platonic ideal of a newsletter writer. Nobody does it better. 

He sent out his latest installment early this morning, and I hadn’t had a chance to read it yet. 

“Oh good!” I thought. “Stu’s writing will give me the exact inspiration I need right now!” And then I thought, “Holy cow, did Michael Arroyo just go 2 for 2 with a home run and 2 RBI?!” But that had to do with the baseball game I’m watching, and it’s not relevant to this conversation. 

So, I open up Stu’s email and am confronted with this opening paragraph:

TEXT: "I've sent a lot of newsletters in my professional life. Nobody, and I mean nobody, reads the Friday newsletter. Not your spouse, not your kids, not the random guy who likes all your posts and might want to cook and eat you. Not you, Terry."

Not the inspiration I was looking for, StuBot!

For some folks, the reference to cannibalistic ideation would be the most troubling part of that lede. For me, it’s learning that -- according to one of the great newsletter minds of our time -- nobody wants to receive these things on a Friday. 

It’s hard not to take this personally. 

We’ve been releasing our Friday newsletter for about 10 years now. Stu was one of the people who helped us launch it, back when we worked together at American Public Media. And to learn now, at this very late date, that he’s been quietly mocking us the whole time, smirking behind his coffee mug Paul Rudd-style, thinking, “Nobody reads Friday newsletters. It’s all for naught. What are these jokers thinking?” It kind of stings. 

It’s got me wondering if I should change things up. Would you prefer a Thursday newsletter? A Wednesday newsletter? I can’t imagine making it a Tuesday newsletter -- I’m not a psychopath -- but I suppose Monday could be an option? 

If you have any strong opinions on this matter, you can email me here and let me know. And in the meantime -- even though I want to hold a grudge and ask you to boycott The StuBot’s newsletter as an act of comeuppance -- I must do the opposite and encourage you to sign-up for it here. In the words of The Driving Crooner, it’s simply too good. Stu is an incredible writer whose easy, deft way with words leaves me feeling a mix of admiration, inspiration, and a non-insignificant amount of writers’ envy.  

As for me, I’m going to go lay down for a while and question all the decisions I’ve ever made in my life, newsletter-related and otherwise. 

Luke and I will talk to you Monday! 

-- Andrew

PS -- The blue shirt I bought is a long-sleeve button down. I hope it fits.

 

Music For Your Weekend

Animated gif of two cartoon teens hanging out and sharing a wired earbud to listen to a song

Listener Bobby: Landgirl by Six Foot Blonde

The algorithm recently fed me a song called “Callin’ to Karma” by the Midwest band Six Foot Blonde. And it’s great. Go listen to it. But, on further exploration of the band’s catalogue, I then stumbled across the 2024 song “Landgirl”, and it checked so very many of those 90s female-led alt-rock boxes I love so very much. 

If you’d like to submit a “Music For Your Weekend” recommendation, just email Andrew here!

 

This Week On TBTL

Somewhat blurry photo of a wind tube guy (like you see at car dealerships). It's blue and looking our way out of the corner of its eyes

#4664 I’m Not A Buzzball, I Just Glug A Lot
Monday, February 16
Luke had more dog-related adventures than expected during his Valentine’s weekend. Andrew spent Saturday hauling bowling alley wood into his garage. And former Morning Edition host David Greene is suing Google for using his voice for their AI slop. 

#4665 Yossarian’s Ulta
Tuesday, February 17
Luke has a new favorite radio station, Andrew has a new exercise routine involving a frozen water bottle, and Olympic skaters are dealing with a new issue called “music rights.” Luke and Andrew also pay homage to Alan Arkin, because they apparently didn’t do so when he died in 2023. They also learn the deep, dark secret that Tony! Toni! Toné! doesn’t want you to know. 

#4666 Wing Theory
Wednesday, February 18
Andrew is pretty outraged over a judge’s ruling on “boneless chicken wings.” Luke discovers some unprecedented megafauna in the Columbia River below his house. They also get into some TV talk (Luke is enjoying Neighbors and The Other Two on HBO) and movie talk (Andrew stumbled on an old French film yesterday that he can’t get out of his head.) 

#4667 Bleu Collar
Thursday, February 19
Luke gets some answers about the mysterious creatures he spotted in the Columbia River yesterday. He and Andrew also discuss the imminent sale of the Seattle Seahawks and how they feel about that. And Luke watched the French film that Andrew’s been obsessed with for the past 24 hours.  

#4668 If Not Who, When? 
Friday, February 20
Luke and Andrew try to get to the bottom of art -- from Robert Therrien’s sculptures to Lana Del Rey’s album covers and the most chaotic songs by the Silver Jews. Plus, Luke is obsessed with a couple of podcasting nuns, and can Rich Eisen get Andrew to like Billy Bob Thornton? 

 

Ten Of The Week

This space is reserved for you! If you’d like to be featured in an upcoming TBTL Newsletter, just click here, answer a few fun questions, and you’ll be a podcast newsletter star! 

You can check out prior Tens of the Week in our archives.

Too Beautiful To Live, P.O. Box 33687, Seattle, WA 98133, United States

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