It’s almost a miracle you’re receiving this newsletter. ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ 

The fact that you are receiving this newsletter today is nothing short of a miracle. 

Hey, everybody! Hope you’re having a nice Friday evening. Me, on the other hand? I’m still at work, and it’s totally my fault. 

For some reason, I have been procrastinating all day, and it’s now catching up to me. I could have been done with work early today. I could be out for a walk right now, or playing fake baseball on my Xbox, or throwing water balloons at my neighbors then scurrying inside to hide. But instead, I’m just getting started on this newsletter. 

Why did the procrastination bug hit me so hard today? Why did I find it so hard to just sit down and start writing? I don’t know. But I do have a complete list (and an honest list! No spoofin’!) of everything I did this afternoon instead of getting started: 

  • Picked up some pho for lunch 

  • Finished Wordle

  • Complained about Connections 

  • Did the dishes 

  • Moved a Reader’s Digest from the dining room to the living room

  • Re-read last week’s newsletter for inspiration

  • Talked to Genevieve about the cats (Bingo stuck his nose in Genevieve’s soup and had to go to “Sky Jail”, aka my windowsill bookshelf. Professor Bananas is heading to the vet later.)

  • Laid on the floor of my office and scrolled through Instagram

  • Paid a credit card bill

  • Called the city to dispute another mysterious “extra garbage” charge on my utilities bill. (More on this Monday, I’m sure.) 

  • Created a new Bluesky account to document my trash days so I can prove to the City of Seattle that I’m not putting out extra garbage. (Monday’s show is basically already produced.) 

  • Moved that Reader’s Digest from the living room to the basement kitchenette

  • Sent three emails that I have been putting off all week 

  • Rubbed some shea butter into my sore, stiff hands 

  • Looked up the symptoms of carpal tunnel, tendonitis, and -- just to be safe -- dengue fever

  • Emptied the basement recycling bin

  • Created a new design for some TBTL merch (watch this space)

  • Moved the Reader’s Digest from the kitchenette to the bathroom, where it belongs. 

  • Changed my shoes

  • Changed them back

  • Sat down to do some serious newsletter writing!

And that about catches us up. 

So, I’m sorry this is both late to reach your inbox, and that it’s not particularly entertaining. But I’m about to produce Luke’s Hey Dummies video, and I’ll bet that’s pretty good! They usually are. 

I hope you all have an excellent weekend. Luke and I will talk to you on Monday! Mostly about my garbage fight probably. ATTICA! ATTICA! 

-- Andrew

Hey Dummies

YouTube still image of Luke and his friend Jon walking outside. John is giving the peace symbol to the camera

Ten Of The Week

Photo of Listener Shafer with shoulder-length reddish hair and a beard standing behind a bar.

What’s your name and where do you live? 

Shafer Hall. Austin, TX. 

When did you start listening to TBTL? How did you find the show?

My college buddy Mike sent me the Art Bell episode, cause we would listen to Art while staying up all night (for whatever reason) in our dorm room.  We often noted how depressing it could be if Art Bell went off the air and we still hadn't finished whatever paper we were working on.

How would your friends describe you?

Smarter than he looks.

What was your favorite cereal when you were a kid?Is it still your fav? 

Fruity Pebbles now and forever.

What food do you love to eat the most of?

Italian

What’s the best or worst nickname you ever had?

My high school best friend called me Claudia ‘cause "Shafer" sounds kinda like "Schiffer."  He still does today.

If you could play one song on TBTL, what would it be?

Public Swimming Pool Blues by Milton

What’s a special skill you have that you’re most proud of?

I can draw a little shamrock on top when I pour a Guinness.  

What’s a special skill that you *wish* you had?

Wish I was better at ollieing a skateboard.  

If you were driving down the street and you saw Luke and Andrew on the sidewalk, what would you yell at them as you drove past?

I sincerely hope this never happens, ‘cause I would asphyxiate myself trying to jam a decade's worth of Bob Dylan mansplaining into one sentence, and I'd die.  

Can other Tens find you on social media? 

I'm on the Stens Facebook page!  Mostly lurking.  


Hey, it’s Andrew here again. Just a reminder that you can find ourTen of the Week form here! If you’ve never been a TOTW before  (or if it’s been a really, really long time) fill out our little questionnaire. And check out ourTen of the Week archive here!

This Week On TBTL

Animated gif of a woman on a couch on a reality TV show saying "Ya might want to listen"

#4194 Dune It And Dune It And Dune It Well

Monday, April 29

Luke finally sinks into the cinematographic splendor of Dune and Dune 2 with a little help from Pirate Walt and a long-forgotten AV cable. Meanwhile, Andrew betrayed a local company this weekend and is now paying the price.  

#4195 Slay Part Of The Day

Tuesday, April 30

Andrew had a very unusual experience at the ballpark yesterday, which leads him and Luke to discover a seemingly soulless corporation behind some of today’s hottest music. 

#4196 A Tile A Minute

Wednesday, May 1

Luke has a new passion, and it’s hanging tile. He and Andrew also discuss the harrowing story of a cat that was accidentally shipped to Amazon. 

#4197 Luke And Kate Plus Eight

Thursday, May 2

Luke changed his entire outlook on life yesterday. Then he switched it back this morning. Plus, Andrew has an update on a TBTL mystery harkening back to the earliest days of the show. 

#4198 The Website Formerly Known As Mountain Dew Code Red

Friday, May 3

Luke and Andrew compare and contrast their routines when grabbing a Subway sandwich. (Andrew’s involves “going wild next door.”) Luke’s also got a new favorite style of pants, but he’s unsure what those pants say about him.

Music For Your Weekend

Animated GIF of Emilio Estevez listening to a walkman

Are You Looking Up? by  Mk.gee

The General by Viv and Riley

Too Beautiful To Live, P.O. Box 33687, Seattle, WA 98133, United States

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